Ghost: Yeah, look guys, I get it, you need those heads because without them you won’t have any eyes, which makes invading the surface of the moon very difficult, but you’re going to have to give my one back. I don’t want to have to haunt whichever one of you assholes has it for the rest of eternity because, all puns aside, I do actually have a life, including a series of autobiographical poems that aren’t going to write themselves, so just hand it over so I can get the hell out of this storm.

Storm Cloud #1: BOOM.

Space Invader # 3: Dude, go ahead and haunt us, knock yourself out. It’s not like we’re even going to notice you while we’re up there invading shit.

Space Invader # 4: Yeah, you’ll probably just get shot by the lasers anyway.

Storm Cloud # 2: CRASH.

Ghost: …But I’m already dead.

Space Invader #1: Did anyone think to ask if we could borrow this ship? I’m pretty sure you’re not supposed to just take them.

Space Invader # 3: Shit dude, we left a note, what do you want? Ok Ghost, fine, you can have your head back, it’s not like I absolutely have to invade the moon or anything. I can just stay home and invade girls instead. Oh and just so you know, you’re not fooling anyone by gnashing your teeth menacingly at us like that.

Storm Cloud # 1: BOOM.

Space Invader # 2: How do you know your one is his?

Space Invader # 3: Because one eye is smaller than the other.

Space Invader # 2: But they ALL have one eye smaller than the other.

Storm Cloud # 2: CRASH.

Space Invader # 4: Ok, who the fuck invited those clouds? Would you two shut up? And since when does lightening go up? Fucking amateurs.

Space Invader # 1: Mum said we have to be nice to them because their dad is an alcoholic or something.

Storm Cloud # 1: BOOM!

Ghost: Jesus. Alright, screw this, I’m leaving. Oh and a plague on your pirate ship! Ha – now your boat has herpes. Later!

Space Invader # 3: Ahh shit.

When they’re not busy being highschool Maths and English teachers, Bernard Farley aka Outputmessage and Micah Vellian are a couple of producers from Washington known collectively as Dmerit, and between producing their upcoming EP they’ve turned out another of their typically solid remixes, this time of The Gay Blades’ cocky “trash pop” outing, O Shot. This self-assured grimy sex-romp of a track sets the New York-based Gay Blades’ (Clark Westfield and Puppy Mills) recently-released debut album, Ghosts, at an oozing pace, only to be ramped up at the end with Dmerit’s funk-fueled remix, which transforms the original into a deliciously slick glam-dance track.

The Dmerit remix is only available through the Ghosts record, so head over to Triple Crown Records to pick up a copy, and visit them at their Myspace page here and say hey.

The Gay Blades – O Shot (Dmerit Remix)

- bec